Savage (Sins of the Banna Book 1) by Erin Russell

Author:Erin Russell [Russell, Erin]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2025-02-26T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter Seventeen

Savage

Ican’t get the images of the fight out of my head. The proprietary way Eamon handled Tobias, even though the boy clearly didn’t enjoy it. The way he seemed completely fearless when it came to my father finding out he’s fucking another man…

“I saw something I wanted, and I took it. Now it’s mine. Padraig respects that.”

I’ve spent my entire life being sure about the things my father hates and the things he needs me to be, and somehow Eamon managed to turn that idea on its head with just a few words. I’ve invested all this energy into being the kind of man my father wants me to be…

And it was what? All a waste?

I just want to know how every single motherfucker I meet, including that smug, obsequious little shit, seems to have the kind of commanding, dominant energy that my father respects. Apart from me. What fucking gene did I not get that lets you act like you’re in control of every situation?

Even Micah has it. And I know that Father is disgusted by the fact that he’s gay, even though he never said as much out loud, but it’s not like he ever did anything about it. He’s always seemed content to keep Micah at arm’s length, both when we were kids and recently, while taking his anger and his vitriol out on me.

I’d always assumed it was out of some kind of deference to Micah’s mother, but maybe I was wrong. Maybe Father sees Micah’s dominance and it earns him the few flakes of respect he needs to remain unbeaten. While I can do every single fucking thing right on paper, but he still manages to see right through me to my soft, constantly crumbling inner core.

And that’s why I disgust him.

Which makes everything I’ve ever done for him a waste. Because I can control how I talk and act and who I fuck, but I can’t dig that fucking weakness out of me, no matter how hard I try.

And I’ve tried.

I turn up the heat on the water sluicing over my body, hoping it can burn these thoughts out of me, but it doesn’t work. Nothing works.

Micah was so different when I overheard him with his little friend the other day. It was a shock. I’ve always known he has this competent, controlled side of him. He’s been amazing at taking care of me, obviously, while I’ve brought him nothing but chaos and misery. But seeing how that translated to his sex life wasn’t something I ever wanted, but it was fucking eye-opening.

“Stay still while I fuck your pretty face.”

“Good slut.”

God, it’s nothing I ever would have imagined coming out of his mouth. And once I saw the dude he was saying that shit to, that made it even more wild. That guy was big. He was basically my size. He had showy gym muscles, and I could have severed his esophagus with a spoon if I’d needed to, but still.

He seemed so

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